My cats vet visit

So it has been a month or two since I started to really blog on here...times have changed and life is so weird. So anyways I wanted to talk about my cats vet visit with my dog today....its been crazy since last year in my daily life of me just living but when she got sick last year I pulled out every necessity to get her healthy again. I was full of rage and anger cause this is my first cat and I didn't know what to do because I can't rely on anyone among me to help. So lets get into the teary eyed filled stuff...shes healthy...thank you god. But she has gain weight over the past year and is up to 16.8 lbs. I have been thinking about it a lot for a few months now till this first weigh in like shes getting ready for a fight with Mike Tyson this whole time. hahha but anyways ...here is the heartbreak. So for the past 6 years I've taken care of this little kitten with vet visits and always there with her ...her surgery to be spade when she was 5 months old with her under the drugs holding my arm while she slept it off during the nite. Taking in every moment with her because god this is my first cat I will not let you down...I have to show you I love also as you do for me. You have believed in me for a reason I will not let you down...then today's vet visit hits...I take her in and for 5 to 10 mins she has to be in a back room with a stranger to get shots to be more healthy for her yearly check up and I cant be there with her to calm her, to show her I'm there, and its ok. I almost lost it but I knew if I did I would get judged like everything else in my life. I don't know if sometimes that I should be crying or caring when life judges you....I just felt so separated from my cat in that moment and wasn't sure how she handle it without me cause we can all say it now...this virus stuff going on in the world can really F off. My cat is my world my first cat...my first blessing from beyond to show me what living really means...and to not be around my cat for the 5 to 10 mins was so rough. I'm glad I didn't do it alone because if I did I would be crying the entire time. If you loved someone or something in life...hold it and give it to god because the strength alone is hard doing it alone...I'm not saying just because I said god you have to believe god because I know in life not everyone believes god but the underlying love for good is there and that is the prevalent of god many haven't understood and we need in life. So anyways..I know others have gone through hell and back during this shut down but were not alone and haven't been for long time. We all hold something in our lives near and dear to us lets keep doing that cause we all know how selfish of life everyone can be. Thanks for reading. See ya.

Depression after getting a cat

Depression can change your life for the better or worse. Most want better. When I was going through deep depression I notice god does listen and miracles do happen. Most the time I was just ignoring that as years went by. I asked myself and god I really want a cat. This was during late fall early winter time. I don't like when people try to control you with negative things and say cats are evil. I don't believe that any animal is. They have a lot of love to give. Anyways depression was hard and I was trying to find myself in this sadness I was living. But my dad walked outside during the cold snowy day and saw this little kitten sitting there freezing. My first thought when we got her inside the house was god this kitten is the most beautiful kitten ever but how am I going to take care of a cat if I can't keep her where will she go after shes warms up from the cold who will take her, who what when why kind of thing. It took a few to remember what I asked god that I really wanted a cat but as soon as I remembered it was like a wave of love pouring into me. I was listened to and this is the form of love being filtered into me and my life. The best part is I don't believe in curses or bad luck from having a black kitten/cat so this was even better. I knew she would be loved and not mistreated because of stereotypes that people have made it out to be for cats like her. I don't think I ever thanked god so much in that time. so I had so many questions what to do but for now we got food for her and some water and she ate and drank. Right after that she fell asleep after purring. I kept her warm in between my legs with her on the blanket. Laying there I was thinking what awesome things are going to happen next. But in that moment I didn't think about depression. This cat was going to help me heal that. I still have depression but seeing her each day gives you hope. I didn't think having a cat would be therapeutic but they are. But anyways here is the photo of her when she fell asleep in between my legs. Have an awesome week everyone. Thanks for reading.